Illustration by Camilla Franklin
The Story Pirates discover that an anonymous gossip blog is spreading hot blog goss about them, and Meghan vows to track down the writer. Featuring two new stories: “Superbag,” a faux movie trailer about an unlikely superhero, written by a 7 year old from Alaska named Lydia, and “Some TVs Have Big Problems,” the twisty-turny adventure of four siblings who find out the real meaning of too much screen time, written by Oscar, a 10 year old from Canada.
Original Stories
Superbag
Lydia, Age 7, Alaska
Lydia talking to Lee and recording a voiceover of the “Superbag” trailer!
One day ago, there was a brown, plastic shopping bag that was floating around in the air. Then a storm came. The bag that was floating around got struck by lightning. Bang! Then the bag turned into SUPERBAG! Superbag is a super hero that saves people. His super powers are laser eyes and flying. He can find people who are lost and hurt with his laser eyes and then scoop them up into him and fly them to amusement parks. Bob was hiking. He saw a BEAR and ran off the hiking trail. Then he noticed he was lost. He was scared, tired and cold. Then he saw a cape and green lasers in the sky. Dun, dun, da-dah! SUPERBAG came to the rescue! He scooped up Bob and took him to a roller coaster ride. Bob had so much fun. The End
Some TVs Have Big Problems
Oscar, Age 10, Canada
10-year-old Oscar
Once upon a time there were four children – named Tricky, Flicky, Micky and Shawn. They were quadruplets. One day they were watching TV - a channel 8 game show called 'The Slice is Right'. They were all drinking ginger ale and eating popcorn.
The game show host asked the contestants “How many pizza toppings are there at Pizza Cut, the pizza chain where your Slice is Right?” The host raised and wiggled his bushy eyebrows, and a laugh track cackled in the background.
Ehhhrrrr!!! The third contestant hit his response button first. He yelled out “seventy four!”
Bump ba da daaaa!!! “You are cor-RECT!” the show host shouted. “Come on up on stage. You have the chance to spin the Frostin' Pizza wheel and you could win… a NEW CAR!!!
Multicoloured laser lights flashed from all corners of the room. A gigantic disco ball in the centre of the ceiling danced around - sending sparkling lights in all directions. A large garage door opened revealing a shiny turquoise Corvette convertible. The contestant's jaw dropped as he came up on stage.
“This is sooo boring” Flicky said to her brother Micky. “These shows are so predictable.”
“Tell me about it” sighed Micky.
“Always the same thing” said Shawn, from the far side of the room. She was sitting on top of the fireplace that was smoldering with ash.
“The only fun part is learning some facts” said Flicky with a sigh…”but always about pizza!”
The contestant walked up to a giant spinning pizza wheel, about 8 feet tall. The wheel was divided into small pizza slices, each with one piece of pepperoni showing a prize to be won.
“Give it a good crank” said the host. “Good luck!”
The man reached as high as he could on the wheel, grabbed onto it, and spun it.
The pictures on the pizza wheel blurred together, forming a big red and white spiral.
The kids felt as if they were being drawn towards the spiral, little by little, standing up on their seats and moving closer to the TV.
The last thing that any of them could remember was tripping over the rug and falling head first into the TV.
And everything went dark…
One by one they woke up in a strange world. “Where are we” asked Shawn? “CANDY LAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” someone shouted. Tricky had climbed a tree made of peppermints and jumped in to a lake of cotton candy. “We will never go hungry again!”
“That guy is over the top” said Flicky with a sigh.
“You know you'll get fat, right?” Micky called from a field of thin green pieces of bubble gum. He was holding the TV remote in his hand.
“I-uph-don't-gack-care-slurp” Tricky said, his mouth full of candy. “This is really-umph good!”
“I guess I don't need this any more” Micky said to himself throwing the TV remote over his shoulder.
GZZT! - The whole scene around them changed without warning….
Next to them was a huge castle. It had four big steeples and several turrets marking its corners.
“We'll have to do a lot of laundry when we get home” said Tricky, whose lower half was completely submerged under the earth. The cotton candy lake had disappeared and his lower half was now buried in dirt.
Micky ran over to the TV remote and said “Is this what caused that?” He pressed the channel button.
GZZT! -
The first thing that Micky saw was … Sand! White sand, black sand, yellow sand, beige sand – windswept waves of sand surrounded them from all directions. And Shawn had a Polish sausage on her head! Flicky burst out laughing.
“What's so funny?” Shawn asked.
“Look up!” Tricky replied.
Shawn looked up and saw an innocent looking sausage, wrapped around her forehead, like a sweat band.
Shawn took the sausage off her head. It started twisting and turning around and around, slowly forming the shape of an animal. It had a lumpy back, a triangular head, and a short round tail. It said “Baa… Hello! I'm Patliam!”
“It's a sheep!” Flicky said in astonishment.
“Yes, I am a sheep” said Patliam. “Do you have any raspberries? I'm hungry.”
“Did you just say you're hungry?” Micky said with a confused look on his face.
“Yes, I did say I'm hungry – I'll take some field grass if you have some.”
“What do you think this is? A grocery store?” Shawn asked. “Of course we don't have any grass.”
“Oh, rats” Patliam replied. “Do you have any TV remotes?”
“Ummmmmm….” said Flicky. “Yeah, actually we do.”
Micky handed the remote over to Patliam.
Patliam took the remote, reached inside his wool coat and brought out map with big red smudges on it. He handed the map to Flicky.
“What are those smudges from?” asked Tricky, who had dug himself out of the dirt.
“Oh… that's ketchup” said Patliam. “I use this map as a placemat sometimes.”
The four kids passed the map around.
“That looks like a treasure map!” Flicky exclaimed.
The mapped showed a desert, much like the one they were in, with a squiggly line showing a path connecting a goofy looking sheep to a big X on the ground on the other side of the map.
“I wonder what the treasure is?” Shawn thought aloud.
“Maybe a mountain of raspberries! Or Dijon Ketchup!” yelled Patliam excitedly.
One hour later….
Huff puff huff puff
Another hour later…
“I'm thirsty!”
Another hour later….
The kids finally arrived at the X on the map, in a circle of cacti.
“I don't think the treasure is here” Micky exclaimed.
“I think we have to dig” said Shawn, rolling her eyes.
Patliam reached into his wool and pulled out five shovels.
“Uhhh… that's oddly convenient” said Tricky.
“I aim to please” said Patliam with a shy grin.
One hour later…
Tink tink tink! “Hey, I think I've hit something!” said an exhausted Flicky
Tink tink TINK! “There's something under here for sure” Micky exclaimed.
TINK TINK TINK!
There was an enormous cracking sound…
“Oh snap...” said Shawn as the ground gave way and four kids and a sheep fell into….
“A crystal cave?”…
In front of them was a golden treasure chest!
“How do we open it?” Flicky asked.
Patliam stepped up and took key (of course) out of the depths of his wool.
The key made a clicking sound in the lock, and the kids slowly opened the lid.
The kids' faces fell. Inside there was only a piece of paper!
“Baaaaa… I wanted dijon ketchup!” whined Patliam.
Tricky picked up the piece of paper and read aloud:
“Find the 'Slice is Right'. ”
“Huh?” There were puzzled faces all around...
“Isn't 'The Slice is Right' a channel 8 game show!?” Tricky exclaimed.
“Hey, that's right” Flicky replied.
Patliam handed the remote over to Tricky who pressed the appropriate button…
GZZT! -
“Welcome back to everyone's favourite game show…. 'The Slice is Right!' Tell me, contestants, how many pizza toppings are there at Pizza Cut, the pizza chain where your Slice is Right?” The host raised and wiggled his bushy eyebrows, and a laugh track cackled in the background.
“74!”
“74!”
“74!”
“74!”
All four kids answered in unison!
Bump ba da daaaa!!!
“You are cor-RECT!” the show host shouted. “Come on up on stage. You have the chance to spin the Frostin' Pizza wheel and you could win… a NEW CAR!!!
Multicoloured laser lights flashed from all corners of the room. A gigantic disco ball in the centre of the ceiling danced around - sending sparkling lights in all directions. A large garage door opened revealing a shiny turquoise Corvette convertible.
Tricky, Flicky, Micky and Shawn all walked up to the stage and one by one spun the wheel and, one by one, they got sucked back out of the TV.
They all woke up lying on the floor in uncomfortable positions.
“Glad that's over with! I'm out of breath!” Micky said to his siblings.
“Tell me about it!” Flicky replied. “Let's go to the kitchen – I hear Mom making dinner!”
Thirty seconds later…
'Hi Mom, is dinner ready?” Micky asked.
Their mother turned around… She had a sheep head! Literally!
“Hi guys!” She said. “Would you like any Dijon Ketchup?”
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